whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
She celebrated a negative pregnancy test by going out to Quizno's. I really don't understand her at all.
Haha im Trying. This detox stuff tastes nasty. It's bad when the only thing that came to mind when i took the first sip was how good it would be with Vodka
I just taped a plastic bag to my ceiling for the next time I have to throw up on the top bunk. Why am I so good at college?
i had to sit with a fan pointed directly to my vag for a good 10 minutes
The Ex's are trying to talk to the GF. Game face bro.
he spent an hour trying to convince us that Ted Nugent is Kid Rock from the future. by the end of it i was very close to believing him.
there is something about beer and popsicles that make the world go round
Guys with values who care about your personality don't cum on your back the 2nd time they you sleep with you.
You were buying shots for everyone, saying, "I got a tax refund. I'm a MILLIONAIRE."
It's a 'fuck poison control' kind of night.
she paid $15 and a box of cheerios for their acid
There should be a guide book that probation officers hand out on "how to tell a tinder girl about your ankle monitor before she notices it at the worst possible moment"
IF YOU DIE ON LSD YOU DIE FOR REAL
I had perfectly good intentions but my penis had other ideas and now I need a place to crash what do you say
Randomize
