508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
just because she blew him doesn't mean she knows his name.
There should be a blender full of rum, tea, and grape jelly in the freezer. She thought it was a good idea until she blew chunks.
Wise words from the guy who drunkenly chipped his teeth on the sidewalk
Crosswalk actually
When a girl says " I never would have come over if I knew I was getting kicked out at 7am." the correct response isn't "but think of how responsible you're being."
don't trust your eyes. just sniff them. if they smell like axe, they are broke, move on to the next.
You leaned over so she could squirt ketchup in your hair and then started chanting "KETCHUP NIGHT!! KETCHUP NIGHT!!!"
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
Dude where are you? I've been here an hour and all I've done is get head from a random in the stairwell.
He called some chick he used to fuck for cash to get food delivered to cheer me up
Shhhh less advice, more soothing words and dirty phrases
See, this is why we give you shit. Ashley gets her car cleaned out, I get multiple enchiladas made, and you get cum in your eye.
Turns out I screen transfered my streaming trucker restroom porn vid to the downstairs neighbors'TV instead of my own, damn you chromecast
I AM A GOOD PERSON AND THEREFORE I DESERVE QUALITY DICK!
She pooped on me during a reverse cowgirl. And it wasn't a little bit either.
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