you'll never believe how fucking awesome rain man is when you're stoned.
he sat in the bathtub shirtless yelling in gibberish for 40 minutes. funniest. stoner. ever.
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
he asked me to put his condom on because he couldn't see without his glasses
I wouldnt endorse that guy if he was walking in a walkathon to raise money for a disease i had
You were mounting an escalator last night, shouting "I have no health insurance" at people
it was the drunk execution of a sober decision, and its much more tasteful than the first mullet
hey dude come in here and see how much of my beard i can put in my mouth!
do you think a sharp knife would stab through a cheese suit?
Sometimes things go your way and sometimes you get hit on by a fat drunk girl.
I have a 16 minute video of you talking about your life. We are calling it your Anthology sponsored by Steel Reserve
He could only go twice. I need a guy with more stamina and is less married
250 people in this lecture & my prof asks who already drank green beer this morning& is drunk right now. I WAS THE ONLY ONE TO RAISE MY HAND
She told him that she never wanted to see him again then took his takeout box of bacon cheddar fries and got in the uber saying "for feminism"
His junk had piercings everywhere. The dick and balls. It was a fucking pirate penis.
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