so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
I have so many mobile devices now, I only use my laptop for porn.
And surprisingly enough iPhone does not have an app for Russian mail order brides.
do you know how scary it is to wake up in a CATSCAN machine after a night of drinking?
I'm in the library if you wanna come give me library head.
oh man. maybe i should puke on his dick? just to test how much he loves me?
In case you were wondering...putting everclear into a humidifier DOES get you really really drunk.
where did this taco bell managers name tag come from ?
I've always wanted to pass out in a bathtub
I think most people do. Your only real mistake was turning the water on first.
I just sat in the bathtub with the shower running so I could eat the whole box of mega stuffed Oreos. What am I doing with my life
Tell him "come over but don't bring a flaccid dick"
Wear something tight
No. Nooooo. No way. She looked like Amanda Bynes. The recent one not the one from All That.
I'm trying to get laid this Halloween, not inspire the next season of AHS
She's dancing around licking a fork of nutella. She is not sober.
that's the second time my extensive knowledge of taylor swift has gotten me laid
Randomize
