I did something last night that I shouldn't have, but I don't want to tell you because you'll probably just make it your fb status...
I see you've learned your lesson.
I guess I'm in a committed relationship. We just had shot 1 of 3 of Gardasil. I'm now dead inside.
Yeah I don't remember why I went to the hospital though but I just called and they have my wallet
made the entire pub sing the british national anthem, puked, rallied, then peed in a telephone booth and have pictures to prove it, taking tourism to another level since 2012.
I had to feed him the pizza because he was too blazed to do it himself
I just woke up tangled in fishing line while wearing someone else's bathing suit with fishes drawn all over me. What kind of sex did we have?
I honestly think the worst part about the night is they just kicked us out of the park and we didn't even get to go into Disneyland Jail
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
Dude, for twins they have shockingly different blowjob styles.
STOP FUCKING MY SISTERS!!!!
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
you kept saying how you wanted to mainline bacardi right into your bloodstream. medical school is doing wonderful things to your brain
Can we smoke pot out of a menorah?
I gave him head during Pitch Perfect 2, I felt like the Bella's were cheering me on with their back up tunes
He can kiss the multicultural 3 some goodbye
so we’ve decided to fuck for our own health
Randomize
