im as drunk as the barefoot contessa. GET TO MY LEVEL
dude. stop pregaming the food network.
When I asked if she spit or swallow she replied "I never learned how to spit"
Side note: THE ORIGINAL LION KING IS COMING THE MOVIES AGAIN--3D STYLE. We need to find shrooms.
I'm lost. Please come find me. I'm inside the I-270 circle somewhere. I can hear laughing.
I just yelled at a bunch of girl scouts for yelling "cookies" to loudly. That hungover
I had to watch them play Salty Cracker. I have never seen a grown man cry with a boner before
WHO THE FUCK TAGS THEMSELVES AT COUNTY JAIL?!?!
Wanna know what sucks. Banging the bosses daughter at work and having the boss walk in while you are fucking on his desk. Good day though. Made 6 sales
Sorry for cyberstalking your dad.
Told him my main goal was to seduce the man and convince him to leave his wife for me. He didn't argue just asked me to let him know if I succeeded so he didn't waste anymore time not sleeping with the secretary at his office. I have an incredible boyfriend.
She was a little thick, but we banged on the beach and fireworks went off as we finished so I think God wanted it
Explain to me again why I'm doing the walk of shame if we fucked at my house?
I answered the booty call in my Trophy Wife cutoff and my ex-boyfriends sweatpants with a bottle of jager.
and how was that received?
I woke up with clothes on this morning and I'm pretty sure you had something to do with that. Thank you.
You said you're gonna end your night with a six pack and awful erotica
Randomize
