My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
if only i could text you this smell
How do you say "I always respond to booty calls" when you give a guy your number?
She cried. My mom screams. And nut went everywhere. It was all around a bad situation.
i just wanna get shit faced and pass out in some random holly bush with a bucket on my head and stockings for shoes.
You fucked everything up-can't pass a cleared kitchen table without getting hard
I think I'm just gonna be a cat and wear slutty black clothes with some eyeliner on my face and pretend my ears got stolen by a drunk guy
I just used a VHS tape as a plate for sanwich
He pushed a skinny white blonde out of the way just to tell me "you have the finest ass, like ever."
I have never loved a nerdy white boy this much.
She jumped on a table and took off her shirt and started yelling things that no one understood. For being 3, she has a dead on impression of a drunk party girl.
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
Well you were listening to music and having sex really loudly. How was I supposed to know you'd hear me making rocket sounds?
Its like my group of friends and I are all dating and we're all just a bunch of Swingers, is that normal?
My feet surprised me
Then it hit me - his penis wasn't a shiny new toy anymore and I wanted a new one.
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