We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
I just shaved my vag with a razor my dad left when he was here a few months ago. Too hungover to think about the Freudian connotations
I decided to have standards now that i've graduated. No guys without a bed frame.
come find me. Outside the bar we were just in waving my syringe in the air
Idk. Im in a bed. the walls are wood. There's a deer mount.. im afraid to turn over and see who's next to me but he's violently cuddly.
My inner buddhist recalls, "You receive the d when you aren't looking for it, only when the d wants you." True story.
Celebrating anything "Eve" is never a good choice! I feel like my soul's been put in a blender on the "destroy" setting- in other news: Happy 4th of July
I took 36 pictures of my lava lamp. your weed wins.
Because you stood over the Ice luge screaming STONE COLD and poured beer on everyone
Buying a pregnancy test at Walmart in the middle of the night in the middle of Tennessee is not really how I imagined my 25th year on this planet starting out...
I'd rather blow Nickelback than be told he gave me gonorrhea. I'd even post it on Facebook for all of the world to like, share, and judge me.
But for real though. That weed tastes like the jolly laughter of Santa Claus.
We didn't get home until 4 am. Her mom let us in, confessed that she had sex with someone she worked with and said he had a small penis. I love this family.
I want you to worship my cock.
That's not how you start a conversation.
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