Literal conversation "you are ________ ____. you facebook friended me"
I may or may not have started my period at the bar. Good thing I have dark jeans on.
Oh my god he is having a sentimental moment right now.
He just sent me like a really heartfelt confession of love in which he ended with "make the apt, I'll hold your hand while you get your clit pierced."
She said i saw her in the study room, waved, disappeared, came back with a coke from god knows where, and slurred "i have a drinking problem but i ate grits"
for the record, graham crackers won't get the taste of cock out of your mouth. also we're out of graham crackers
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
Theres a picture of me with cut up clothes rolling in the policeman's lawn, I missed you, summer.
I think I'm going to postpone my photo shoot until my Gpa dies. I don't want to be in lingerie and stripper heels when I finally get the call
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
81 degrees in april.... Thinking margaritacicles, you in?
I'm having post-experience "why didn't I fuck her in a public bathroom" regrets
You missed the winter stoner olympics last night....I got the gold in blunt rolling
I haven't seen her in probably 3 months and when she showed up wasted to my house she promptly pulled out her tit
I just set an alarm for 5 am tomorrow morning titled "Wake and Bake Its Christmas motherfucker"
I hope I didn’t eat too many edibles just now. I got shit to do today. Like make Jell-O shots and take a shower.
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