I wannas sexs uuuuu
Dude, you just left me a 3 minute voicemail of pop rocks in your mouth. Im sitting right next you
I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
Hey guys, just to let you know, I have a boyfriend...so that hookup was kind of a one time thing.
was that a mass text??
So...it's hour 4 of day 5 of week 7 of my internship, and so far all ive done is shred paper. all. day. long. it's like working for Enron.
I feel so grown up. I just went to home depot to buy actual home improvement supplies instead of stuff to make a bong with.
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
Not many best friends can say they've all made out with a homeless guy
this is getting really bad. i thought the chandelier in the dining room was one of those claws from the claw games in an arcade and i spent the past five minutes jumping left to right so the claw wouldn't grab me
Dad was on the deck drinking straight bourbon. He stopped, puked on his feet, and then continued drinking and talking about compound interest.
I don't know what I'm more pleased with, the blowie last night or that fact that there's still 20 dollars in my wallet
Would you think less of me if I were eating pizza on the toilet right now?
I seriously feel like I just crawled out from under a shit covered rock. I'm NEVER drinking like that again...well, not for alteast a solid 3 hours.
Ate a slug for 39 dollars
I wouldn't expect anything less from a PhD student
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