You had sex with him even after he literally described himself as a "coldplay guy"? There's a line you just don't cross. There is a line.
The only way I could have failed my exam worse is if there would have been a drug test portion
Ok, so for future reference, in Rome, "piano bar" means "brothel".
After he convinced me that my friend had died and come back to life, I decided I was having sex with him that night, and that I should lay off the drugs for a while.
Hahhaha I literally just rolled outta bed and went to get beer in my pj's and slippers. God I love graduating
She carried my bag of puke down the aisle and the flight attendant wouldn't move the beverage cart so she put the puke bag in the flight attendant's face and said "I have a bag of sickness!" I've never seen a cart move that fast.
It felt like a sumo wrestler slapped me. With a wet hand. 8 times in a row.
I tripped while walking across the stage and while trying to pick my diploma back up my flask fell out in front of the dean
Dunno. My heart says "no", my brain says "maybe" and my dick says "YES YES FOR THE LOVE OF GOD YES!!"
I'm pretty sure that the bartender arranged a marriage for me last night. Sounds like a legit birthday present to me.
Is this like a preordered booty call?
HANDS OFF UNTIL AFTER I DO BUTT STUFF WITH HIM.
Then it hit me - his penis wasn't a shiny new toy anymore and I wanted a new one.
Idk if I want to put a bra on
Remember the Giant sandworm from the movie Dune? Well that's about how big his dick is. No bulshit.
Randomize
