she has a tiny mouth but huuuge vocal chords
Memo to self- delete texts about butt sex from you before giving my mom my old phone to use.
Saw 2 former students outside gas station. gave me money to buy 2 12 packs, asked if I wanted to go to their party.
I told them I had a gf and took one of the 12 packs. Come over.
Texas should really raise its teaching standards.
The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
So im going to watch Hocus Pocus in my footie pajamas... How am I in college?
Lowest moment of my life just occurred. I literally threw up all over myself in front of my parents.
Chelsea handler, $19 million - Forbes women top 100. Seriously she shaped her career around her love of vodka. HERO.
Ok now I cleared out half the bar and Em and I have 5 Jameson shots lined up for you. You have 15 min.
But he has cupcakes AND I'm guaranteed an orgasm. .. I feel like I shouldn't even have to actually make a decision here.
I don't even care that it's before church. I feel like God actually wants me to have this shower beer.
how much do I hate his dog? was just googling to see if you can rent a hungry eagle for the weekend hate.
You just sent me an audio message of you peeing. That’s true love right there.
I seriously thought Satan had his hand up my asshole and was pulling out my soul. Never. Again.
I want you to defile me in my childhood bed.
Jenna is yelling bc of the condom wrappers and cum stains. This is the 3rd and last time you have sex in my roommates bed.
Randomize
