hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
There is NOTHING better than watching a child being chased by an ostrich.
the guy was wearing a viagra shirt, i knew what i got myself into.
I need to make a 'no kissing' rule for my casual hookups during cold season...this cold is so not worth it.
I'm still not sure if it was intentional, but the chiropractor definitely cradled his balls on my shoulder. He even seemed to adjust the sack for comfort. I think I should be flattered. He is a doctor, after all..
Bad news. I baked you a cake and one of my fingernails is missing.
I would let Bear Grills repel down a waterfall using my dick if I could go to sleep right now.
Some girl took her panties off, soaked them in vodka and wrung them out into a line of guys' mouths! Awesome!
No, NOT awesome. Where the fuck do you go drinking!?!
I found my spirit animal in the shower. It's a sloth/bear that lives in my chest.
Instead of asking him how many women he's slept with I just got straight to the point and asked how many Plan B pills he's purchased
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
Should I put the spider I likely swallowed in my sleep into my calorie tracker?
THERE IS JIZZ ON MY CEILING. HOW THE FUCK IS THERE JIZZ ON MY CEILING
The thought of you trying to procreat frightenes and disgusts me!
Randomize
