i just passed a truck with a bumper sticker saying "i'd rather be cummin than strokin." god bless the midwest.
took 5 apple pie shots. caution: flames. not digestable.
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
im probably the most hungover person watchin icarly right now
She told me she needed to clarify that we are not fuck buddies, we are best friends that have sex once in a while
I want to hold her baby but I'm afraid I'll give it a contact buzz
I seem to have forgotten that I am wearing a one piece bathing suit under my clothes
I had wine for breakfast at 6am, that's how visiting my parents went.
And then I discovered that while drunk last night I called the NAACP and left an angry voicemail demanding they fix the racism at my school
We inadvertently arrived at the strip club on Bear Night. The dancers all look like young Santa Claus and there's a buffet....
of all the things that should kill me, scurvy wont be one of them
Well, while we went through airport security, I found out Mom got her clit pierced, so there's that.
Someone left a middle school yearbook here. I recognized one kid from banging his mom last year.
I would offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals..
Randomize
