Dude, my boy c***** and I hooked up with Asian sisters last night in the same room
Then I put on blue by Eiffel 65 and security showed up and yelled at us for being too loud. Also, they stopped fucking because no one can fuck to eiffel 65
so Mike and I made a deal. we'd do anal if he would help me pick out carpet tomorrow.
What...you let him do that?
It wasnt that bad. the two minutes it took is nothing compared to the 10 hr day I have planned for him tomorrow
Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
How am I a tease?
Dude you flashed me ur vagina and walked away.
ONLY PART OF IT.
We drank a $4 handle of tequila until 5 am. Please think about that.
I drunk madeout with my mom last night. it's guna be an awkward breakfast.
I am at the point where deciding not to drink alone is worth a rocky music montage in and of itself.
I gained confidence after I found out she was a lesbian. At least that way I could flirt with her and convince her to buy me taco bell after the bar
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
Hickies on top of my hickies. I need a leash and/or a positive female role model
I was so high I told him we should rub faces and pretend to be wombats. He was surprisingly enthusiastic about it.
Just did an entire nights worth of bar crawl in an hour. Boom
I consider myself to be an upstream bisexual
You're the salmon of the gays...
MIDGETS
????
woke up between a girl's legs. make your own conclusion.
Randomize
