I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
Well at one point you put icyhot on your feet because you lost your shoes and it was snowing outside.
so how was last night?
got high and had our usual talk about the definition of cole slaw. then tried to call the ramen noodle company and convince them why my face should be on thier packages.
You'll be happy to know that I did indeed fracture my rib in a sex related injury
Yea, i was tied up and blindfolded. And someone was throwing chicken nuggets at my face.
the saddest part is, this is not even the first time i've woken up in a shopping cart with a concussion.
Siri just called me GayBoy in front of my family. I will destroy you.
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
He fingered me and now wants me to go get plan b because of it. WE'RE IN COLLEGE.
I've officially dedicated my newly single life to making myself squirt.
I feel worse lying to the guy I hooked up with than I actually do for cheating on my bf
If I make it through this whole bridesmaid process without anyone knowing that I actually hate everyone but the bride, including the groom, I deserve a complimentary bottle of vodka.
I wish I was there so i could bitch slap his incredibly sexy face
she's always on high-alert for lesbians
I swear to god my spidey sense only tingles when someone’s about to die or you’re being a hoe.
Randomize