Is it bad to use cherry nyquil as substitute for grenadine? Because i just went there.
Nah, totally cool. It already has the alcohol in it.
He did a double fist pump when he discovered the Magnums fit and skipped back towards the bed.
There comes a time in every girls life when she must use her boobs for good instead of evil.
Your pregnant arnt you
Best morning ever. I saw a bum giving another bum a blowjob downtown.
I just decorated my birth control case with Lisa Frank stickers. If that doesn't scream 'I'm not ready for babies' I don't know what does.
In hindsight buying the pill crusher with my vicodin prescription might have been too much.
Went to a date party without a date and had a threesome wooops
so I'm staring at this cat and wondering..is the tail of the cat the derivative of it's head?
stop getting stoned after studying for a calc final.
Favorite thing said to me in 2012: It's like you have two tongues!
Were you keeping a list?
How about we just fuck in random places all around campus, and skip the boring relationship part?
This is the third time my roommate and I have drunkenly hooked up. I'm starting to think she's not as straight as she says she is.
This is like a walk of shame down memory lane.
i like coming up with different names when i reference that night. 'the night i got kicked out of the bar', 'the night i escaped from the hospital', 'the night we had that threeway'...
my penis made a compromise with my morals
I couldn't find my contact solution so I thought mixing toothpaste and water would work
Randomize
