She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
so he tried marking my clit with a sharpie so he could "find it again next time".
you make it seem like sunflower seeds and pinot grigio are not in the food pyramid.
Even tho I saw his penis. He is still a really nice guy.
He literally sends me dick pictures, EVERY DAY. SEVERAL DIFFERENT ANGLES ..it's like I GET THE POINT.
I was standing when I hit it. I barely made it to the couch before the walls started turning into people.
My stomach is revolting cause i have put food in it and no alcohol.
That's the kind of break up sex that keeps couples together. Damn.
DID YOU REALLY JUST GIVE ME A FIRST BASE SIGN
Never thought I would be taunted by little kids about my walk of shame
i have to vacuum my washing machine now, asshole
I want to be "performing a disservice to society by actually wearing clothes in public" hot.
that game of battleshots got way too fucking intense. why does the couch have burn marks now.
Bitch how dare you drink my dos equis
How's work going?
Boring. I have a cat on a leash right now
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