So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
Charging the asians next door to us $5 a page to print their final papers because theirs broke. Bars close in 2 hours, lets go
I met him yesterday and now he's wanting to hold hands and kiss in public. i hate this
How's work?
Spinning.
Just violated the laws of fuck-buddyship and talked to him about my personal life. I don't like it.
Don't be alarmed at the girl laying on your bathroom floor.
I just held a marble with my kegel muscles for 5 min. You may call me COCKCLAMP 9000!!!!
Some poor guy found you passed out in a bathroom stall. Again with your dick out. Looks like you got to rage after all.
So, the officer that worked my wreck, I'm rockin his world tonight. He saw me high on morphine in the ER. So he knows my level of crazy. Think he'll agree to wear his gun?
So many things can go wrong tonight.
I went on a psycho cleaning spree so I feel I've earned the right to spend the day in bed watching porn and eating sausage biscuits. If you bring alcohol you can join me.
All other girlfriends are inferior. You are the chosen one.
I'm at a loss. By loss I mean singing songs from Wicked and pretending I'm at the Oscars
So...I maybe walked across campus last night with my life size Joe Biden cut out.
Had a vaginal orgasm. I feel like I made sex my bitch.
Theres a free llama on craigslist. Are you in or are you in?
I was pretty sure he wouldn't be into me after I fucked his brother, and then his best friend, and yet, here I am doing lines off his stomach
Randomize
