There was a fist fight in my basement last night at four in the morning, in case you were wondering
But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
Reason #437 to hate Louisiana: Just went to the public bathroom at work. It was so humid the toilet seat was damp and sticky. Either it's the humidity or I sat in somebody's yesterday piss. I choose to believe the humidity.
its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
she asked if i had a condom...i said yes...when we finished it wasnt on...told her it was at home on my dresser.
I feel like I just walked the hall of shame thru the marriott. Everyone stared.
I think it was the shoes and limping. Not the sex. I could b wrong.
his name is devion and he has a voice like velvet and handcuffs
Missing part of a tooth cos I tried to open a beer with my teeth, just saw a dude that looked like bill Cosby though so things are looking up
Fingerblasting some girl on the deck tryna get her to fuck on a lifeboat
No I did not just post a Craigslist ad for a used stripper pole because I can't afford my own. But now that you put the idea in my head I might have to.
It's Been a while since I puked in vomit bush. I hope it doesn't feel neglected
He's 5'2" and his dick 4'8"
Do you remember the guy that smelled like hot dogs?
Can you masturbate to someone liking your instagram picture?
Yeah I'm just gonna stay here and spread my horniness to the world.
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