Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
So he sent me a text that said "say hi to your vajayjay for me"
Was there any message he wanted you to relay to your asshole?
You taught me that having a dip while u shit is awesome. I appreciate u for that
My psychiatrist is "consulting" others. I am high-achieving nuts.
My 10 year old brother handed me a pack of condoms and said "here, i don't wanna be an uncle yet."
Do you think she's aware of my deep hatred or should I set her hair on fire in her sleep?
I just wanted to hook up with a white guy to prove that i could go back.
I just want to have weird supply closet sex with him... and then I'll be all set. Fired, but all set.
I have a boner and a quesadilla why aren't you here
Sometimes I envy you, when I'm not praying for your soul.
I just found out via Facebook that my old dorm room is now the free condom distribution room on campus...IT'S LIKE THE UNIVERSE KNOWS!
I can't even spell what he said he was on. And I had to call 4 people before someone had heard of it.
he was making out with her against the stove and started a fire--the thirst literally almost burned the place down!!
He said he'd prefer a photo rather than discuss politics, I sent him a snapchat "conservative shorts 4 conservative man". He said "be liberal"
Your life is a soap opera of great sex, cats, and booze.
Randomize
