My mouth tastes like defeat. Did he at least have money?
She just asked to stimulate my prostate, man law requires you come pick me up
You think the Elephant Man ever tried to pick up chicks claiming all his appendages were elephant-sized?
she started talking about my kids
was she topless?
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
Yeah, I just met her and we got arrested together. I think it was a good bonding experience.
did you by any chance leave me that 7 minute long voicemail of you running and constantly tripping into bushes?
They just asked a fat guy to move to the other side of the plane. Send me a pic of your tits incase we crash
Just for future questioning, I didnt break up with you over text
He went down on me while I had rollers in my hair. I've never felt more like a lady.
HOW CAN YOU EXPECT ME TO KEEP YOUR SECRETS IF YOU KEEP ON TELLING ME THEM.
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
It's so weird fucking this kids aunt then going to the gym with him everyday, but my sick minded self loves it.
So I sniffed too hard this morning before work and I THINK THE COCAINE JUST STARTED ROUND 2.
Randomize
