sometimes i wish i was the girl in a porno. that way if i couldn't get any, i'd just order a pizza and do him.
I mean come on, he's the best quarterback in the state and doesn't even know how to put on condom
It's not like I ment to feed you the shots of vodka, my hand just kinda slipped.
Both his mom and his sister were hitting on me when I stopped by today. He isn't a real friend anyway, right?
Okay do all 29 year olds have erectile dysfunction or just the two I've slept with?
Well on the plus side I have started adding benefiber to my bottle of wine
I've already made the "blackout on move in day" decision
Long story short he broke into a preschool and threw all their cones into a tree.
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
WHAT A DUMBASS ugh I'm so glad he looks like a middle aged dad now
Was so high at one point last night that while showering I was worried that using too much hot water would slow down our Internet.
I see the guy who's been trying to get me to let him eat my ass became engaged on Facebook today; would framed screen shots be an appropriate wedding present?
'valentine' just autocorrected to 'cake robe' in my phone
I think that summarizes my life up pretty accurately
What’s the best way to find out if he’s into anal?
I think you have the wrong number, but good luck with that
Randomize
