Definitely locked eyes with the stripper who gave me a lapdance last night as she walked by me and into the Ann Taylor Loft in Times Square.
I just heard a girl in all seriousness say, "I told him I'm not a stalker. I just really really want to talk to him."
i know im back at school when i can poke any random spot on my body and expect a 80% chance that theres a bruise there
I just asked the dr if it was herpes while wearing my shirt from the strip club...
I told you to stay away from the strippers in Oklahoma
there's a sledge hammer in the bottom of the swimming pool... so whatever happened last night was probably awesome
Do you think a former stripper/heroin addict constitutes as a high risk sexual partner?
Woke up in the front yard with a chalupa and a firecracker in my back pocket. It's what the founding fathers would want
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
Don't judge them too harshly for getting kicked out of a strip club. Happens to the best of us.
You are the coolest girlfriend ever.
CRAIGSLIST IS NOT THE ANSWER
IM LONELY AND HORNY
I just want somebody who'll randomly bring me pizza and lovingly squeeze my butt. Is there a dating app for that, do you think?
YOU RAISED A SWORD OVER YOUR HEAD AND SCREAMED AT HIM WHAT THE FUCK ELSE DID YOU THINK WOULD HAPPEN?!
On the way home she told me she was in kindergarten when 9/11 happened
Update: my mom just told someone to shut up and suck her dick
So someone just asked us for our kidneys?!?
Randomize
