Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
Stumbled into class and into a desk. When I fell my bottle broke in my backpack. I had to leave there was vodka everywhere.
just found a bag of Oreos in my purse labeled "emergency".
Theres a picture of me with cut up clothes rolling in the policeman's lawn, I missed you, summer.
Just did lines off your face, congrats on getting in the magazine bro
I tried to say goodbye but you were hugging a trash can and I wasn't sure if you had clothes on
Although, I did get to see a Raiders fan and his toothless girlfriend get roughed up by the police and dragged out of the stadium. So the night wasn't a total loss.
He was barking to the beat of "I like to fuck" and then chugged 3 beers and fell off the deck.. I should have gotten community service hours
It's a "party harder or raise your standards" kind if night.
I JUST WATCHED PAULA DEEN PUT BUTTER IN HER BLOODY MARY. This is not a drill. Real life.
Two really nice girls helped clean the taco out of my hair.
Congrats. You made me have an orgasm in Starbucks.
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
He asked if I could not say his name during sex cause he liked the girl in the apartment above me.
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