WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
I definitely recall eating shredded cheese out of the bag while you were wearing that apron.
who said I'd never amount to anything...i just won 'most enthusiastic' at my poledancing class
I would not wish his dick upon my worst enemy
She literally pulled the door off the hinges and "dropped" it down the stairs... Do I just say 'good job' and put her to sleep?
I just bought $54 in Easter crap to try and blend in the pregnancy test... And FYI, it totally worked.
I had to assert my dominance as Alpha Drunk.
Bailey. He has a soul patch. Idgaf if he was an NFL player. Nobody with a soul patch is attractive.
Word of advice, don't put your jar if peanut butter in the microwave, blue fire comes out
That rando I gave head to on the beach just endorsed me on LinkedIn for Oral Communication Skills. So there's that.
Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer...
Well that's what you get for messing around with her vagina. I told you it was a fickle and insatiable creature.
I specifically remember rubbing my eyes thinking I could definitely go blind and I really like came to terms with it I was like ok my other senses will develop this is fine
I ask for a dick pic and he sends a picture of Dick Cheney. Who does that?
You know, I'm starting to enjoy brazilians. One day I'm going to make a therapist very very happy.
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