Her dad smelled like someone lit a fart and burned their ass hairs.
Things to remember: Girls don't appreciate it when you yell "Beast Mode!" when switching to doggy style.
Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
i might have gotten away with it if "don't tase me bro!" wasn't the first thing i said when i rolled down my window.
Her boobs looked like leather oven mitts. No more cougar hunting for awhile.
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
I don't think I have ever puked up that much free breakfast in my life...thank god for Nickle Beers.
Watching frozen planet. There's a beach master sea lion with about 50 sea lion bitches fighting another sea lion for said bitches. It's a bloody battle. Dude. You have over 50. Share.
I'm about to have a bowl of Advils... without any fucking milk.
You must have my penis confused with someone else's...which is disappointing
He added me on LinkedIn while I was baking weed brownies in the boxers he left here... Is this adulthood?
Well statistically J has a 1 in 3 chance of hospitalization when downtown
And a 3 for 3 for disapeearing
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
About the whale....I wasn't completely awake.
Thank you for always being there for me.
Sorry wrong derek... Do u have any weed?
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