i found a roscoes card in my pocket that says 'fuck me bare fo $15.20'. Wow
I feel like our bond is deeper now that we're both sleeping with married men. now we're really bffls
I'd rather say I'm a whore then admit it's his child. Its that bad.
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
You hit on my mom and then passed out in the kiddie pool.
I started sorting laundry at 6 am. He finally got the hint and left
Its gonna be a symphony of fucks
You had salsa out and brought a banana on a plate to bed
I set up her keyboard so that no matter what she does, it will open up RedTube. Click and command Q all you like, its going to porn. No I play the waiting game
He stared me down while singing "Let Me Love You" to me while we were having sex. I don't know whether to marry him or file a restraining order.
they asked me about my neuroscience major and I said 'the brain is the outer space of the body' and passed out. it appears my ivy league education is not going to waste
I just got winded making my bed. How do you think the workout plan is going?
My v day was great. There's a cum stain in the shape of a handprint on my sheets
What's the blow job-backrub exchange rate these days? I've got some killer stress knots
That confirms what we've all known all along. I'm a bad gay. I have no fashion sense.
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