Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
He looks too sensitive, like he's going to write me a poem and cry after the first time we have sex.
Why are there so many empty soda cans in my room?
You put them in a circle around your bed and said it was the best way to ward of the witches from hocus pocus....then you remembered you needed salt too. I'm assuming you havent gone to the bathroom yet.
I'm so drunk that I ordered a root beer at the bar. Whoops?
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
According to the stories I've heard I decided I was a stuntman after my 6th shot of Jack
He is juggling broken glass botttles, I think its time to cut him off...
Remind me not to get naked underneath a tree I'm allergic to again.
You carried me up the stairs after I told you not to. And what did you tell me? "Let me test my strengths."
But wait then while giving his drive thru order he goes in mid sentence, "Hey baby it's Travis remember me?"
To be fair I went my whole first week without showing up to work drunk!
I walked past his mum on the way out and she offered me toast in a napkin "for my travels". Being home from uni is weird.
As he put it in he shouted "geronimo!"
Wow... So was the sex good?
Yeah but it doesn't matter. My vagina is not a pool.
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
I am at a cat party and I just witnessed people lapping vodka out of a bowl for a contest. Lol
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