Whoa Z and x make the same sound
Its way too early to be sitting naked at his dining room table...
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
explain to me why "crisis hotline lolz" is in my contacts?
Apparently i was peeing on things and marking my territory. I broke their light socket too. Needless to say im banned from their apartment.
It would be been irresponsible not to make cleaning the apartment into a drinking game
How long can I microwave pasta with a 20 percent alcohol content?
we woke up to him feeding us cheetos at 3am. and by feeding i mean shoving them in our mouths and saying "i mean who doesn't like cheetos"
apparently i walked around all last night forcing people to beer bong whatever drink was in their hand. so far this morning ive had three people refer to me as beer bong man
I want to get business cards and hand them to hot guys and say " hey if you ever want to like makeout and pretend it never happened call me"
Fingerblasting some girl on the deck tryna get her to fuck on a lifeboat
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
You said you were going to start drinking less. Drinking 25 small airplane bottle shots do not count.
You know the party's good when you say "Never have I ever caused an emergency landing" and someone drinks
Dude chill patience is a virtue.
WHY DOES PATIENCE HAVE TO BE A VIRTUE, WHY CAN'T HURRY THE FUCK UP BE A VIRTUE?
Randomize
