Do ugly people know they are ugly?
The quiet ones do.
You can bone my sister, but I will end our friendship if you write 'LOLERS' one more time at the end of your texts.
After the sixth shot I started to slur my pauses.
just upgraded from jello shots to jello bowls blacking out just got that much more delicious
apparently i found nail polish and started playing a game i made up called "paint a nail, do a shot"
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
Confidence is key. All I had to tell him is I'm drinking a bottle of wine and eating chocolate today to celebrate that I love myself. That's how you get a Valentine, my friend.
If you wanna be a real wingman, create some insecurity and comment on that pic of all the hot girls with "Id do every girl in this pic.. except the fat one".
I know you`re my best friend, but when i wake up with this bad of a hangover and no memories of last night, i dont want to see your tits ad my background.
Officially drug you out of White Castle last night by the hood on your sweatshirt after you cussed out the attendant and stole the satisfaction guaranteed sign because they were closed!
And then we felt it necessary to continue drinking for another 4 hours, yikes
found $100 my ex got arrested and I can receive free health insurance I gotta tell ya 2014 is really going to be my year
I preemptively put on a cape before eating a bunch of weed brownies. Best decision ever.
If pulling your dick out counts as a hobby that is his.
When the state fair security guard came to yell at her for having outside food and drink she threatened to kick him if he tried to stop her and then she proceeded to chug the whole bottle.
classic
5 am booty call not ok. The fact I actually went over definitely not ok. My vag needs to learn some control.
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