I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.
how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
i fucked a milf yesterday.
i'm not impressed, in this generation that could technically mean a 16 year old.
just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
you kept saying 'its nothing a six pack wont fix' as they loaded you into the ambulance.
so I woke up without pants, but my cardigan was still on and fully buttoned. curious.
i cant text you anymore tonight, God gave me two hands for two cups
I just wanted to share with you that my life has come to naked arts and crafts, to fix my flask, with a rum and coke in my hand... Good luck on your exam
Ah well. Drinking wouldn't be drinking without mystery bruises
Agreed.
this whole "benign brain tumor" is truly a blessing in disguise. I almost want to start bringing MRIs to the bar because sympathy pussy is flowing like the nile
I just shaved my pubes into a heart shape. if that doesn't scream romantic idk what does
Nothing says "Happy New Year" like having to shit into a plastic bag.
You just can't go back to being friends with someone after you sucked their balls
I feel like you're encouraging me to commit a felony.
I feel like you're wasting time.
Randomize
