He keeps looking? I tried to shag. I invited him to this table but he went to ze other one! If he shaves his 'tache I would totally hit it.
i have the juiciest gold medal in my pants
I swear, if I find out you're lying, I'm going to put your name on one of those herpes watch websites and put the link up on every social networking site in existence.
Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
I love seeing the creepers that friend request me outside of facebook. its like seeing a unicorn in the middle of campus.
He ended up walking out of his bedroom and told me to look at the nonexistent fire he was holding in his hand. Im upset I didn't take those shrooms.
It's been so long since i rode in a trunk. I'm riding in a trunk btw
Fuck morning classes and our weekday drinking habits.
Took 45 minutes to masturbate. Fuck you Zoloft. I'm never gonna be diagnosed with depression again
I still can't believe you had sex with someone who willingly went by Peaches.
He said he was gonna go pull a lochte and the next thing we know he's outside ass naked peeing in the neighbors kiddie pool.
How do you feel? I threw up in a towel. Also, a lot of other things.
I’m not dating him for his personality. I’m dating him so I can steal his dog.
Randomize