The more I sober up, the more sick I am/realize how weird dancing around a wine bottle was
accomplished twins. life is a go
i think i gave myself a perma-hangover. or god just hates me.
I'm going to rise like a phoenix out of the drunken, shameful ashes that were last weekend.
Even tho I saw his penis. He is still a really nice guy.
He was streaking. We were hammered. We had roman candles. It only made sense to shoot them at him.
I'm crawling around naked in my room looking for my hairbrush. Just thought I'd put that image in your head.
No one should ever have to Neosporin their nipples. At least he apologized.
While he was gone for spring break I took his head board... I don't wanna wake up from his shenanigans for the rest of my college career.
She climbed up the stairs with three brownies in one fist, two in the other, and one in her mouth. Also, she opened the bedroom door with her foot. I may be in love.
Dude I was tripping acid when she was crying and I literally couldn't defend myself
My little sister just helped me edit my nudes so that's how my night is going
Well I got black out drunk before the rehearsal dinner and berated my family with insults. But other then that it was a good time
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
This sucks! All of the twenty something dick I was getting went home when the university closed
Randomize
