Ppl just aren't as funny as we are
Nothing better then your mother meeting someone you randomly had sex with and him introducing himself as the guy who rocked her world once.
The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
I dont care how high you are, meat and sprinkles dont mix dude
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
Actually, you don't want to see me.. reached an all time low drinking kahlua out of the bottle concealed in a macdonalds bag
They made out. Sounded like hippos drinking water
I just bought 7 working mopeds off a guy for $300. We are 60% of the way to our gay biker gang dream.
He is stood at the top of the stairs nursing the stolen cat
While randomly hooking up with my neighbor last night he says "it's okay we're neighbors".
Sometimes I just want to kiss you without you pulling ur cock out and waving it at me
Well my summer has already been productive. I partially caused a divorce.
Got really high to see my fist college experience unfold. Too high to find my classroom but I found the McDonald's down the street
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.
Sorry about kicking you last night but you don’t mess with a girls margarita bucket. Ever
Randomize
