Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
Seriously, I was a high class hooker. I was snorting shit Rachel, white powder, lines formed with credit cards, the dudes house was beautiful. Magnum condom. Adorable puppy dog. Pretty sure at some point I was sleeping on a washing machine. Boxing Gloves.
Those were the highlights of my night.
Everyone else in class agrees the weed smell is coming from me
Realized it was likely to be cursed, didn't want my own Johnson magically turning into some sort of fire breathing reptile and eating me
That is an interesting fear as well as image
It's gotten to the point that when I close my eyes to cum all I see is candy crush
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
I kept on yelling at him to get his shit together as he was puking
FINALLY GOT MY TENTH DICK. PARTY FOREVER
Trying to figure out why my back is hurting. And then I remember I got fucked up against a tree last night
Always keep a stash of tequila in your work desk. That is like adulting 101.
I just blew thrown up hashbrowns out my nose. That's the level of this hangover.
Can I pee and smoke my bong at the same time or is that like eating on the toilet
I didn't know how to commemorate his death, so I snorted a fat line off of his obituary. Rest in peace.
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