I am the drunkest girl in the tree.
I'm wayyy too drunk to be in a parade right now
The problem with having your drunkeness documented at a wedding is not only does it show up all over facebook, but all over professional photography websites.
she hid the dish soap because she was afraid someone would confuse it with the margaritas and drink it instead. her reasoning was "theyre both soo pink...i cant tell them apart"
yeah, we figured out that passing a joint between cars was a pretty bad idea
Buying Plan B right after a lecture on feminism. It's nice to know who I can thank for that right.
You threw up with your ski mask on still.
FALSE ALARM! I didn't piss myself, I fell asleep in the shower and then drunkingly crawled into my bed
There's green glitter on my nipple rings. #mardigras2013
What do you mean you don't want me to steal the manikin do you have any idea how expensive inflatable dolls are I can't get that for your birthday
I would say I miss her friendship, then I remember that she gave 4 guys the clap. I'm good.
How drunk do you think I'll be by the time I get home?
I just watched you drink a whole glass of wine through a Twizzler. Pretty drunk.
Go makeout with Mickey Mouse so we can get FastPass tickets
I had a meltdown and you quoted Puddle of Mudd to me
Bad part of last night: I puked in my hair. Good part of last night: I assembled a posse.
You kept pulling me aside saying "look what I found"
Randomize
