Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
then she stuck her tongue in my ass
I thought we were talking about reason you aren't going to marry her?
You're doing that 'overestimating how much I care' thing again.
I have acquired 14 pictures of hard dicks tonight... I was on a mission. Don't even pretend you aren't proud.
He was bigger soft than my ex was hard. A gold medal rebound.
Well, that was my first dog walk of shame. Nothing says "I've got my life together" like an inside out shirt and a baggie full of dog shit.
After we had breakup sex it took him longer to say goodbye to my boobs than it did to me...
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
This is not a drill. I need a cape. And a tuxedo. Simultaneously. Repeat. NOT. A. DRILL....
And I had on a penis ring on the whole time at dinner. And I ate veal...
I danced shirtless on a platform with a fucking stripper who went to MIT
We need to feng shui this bitch.
He fucked me so hard my hair extensions fell out
I'm too depressed to drink my wine. That is what I would call a serious problem
I will warn you that there is a pic of me riding a buffalo....and for the record, I was completely sober!!
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