the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
My cousin just told me i smelled good. She must like the smell of cum.
whore
I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
The lady at the touchless car wash just gave me the look of death. How do I say, "sorry it's not my puke" in Spanish?
21st Birthday Idea: liquor store gift registry. Give me a promotion.
Man, jail baloney is awful.
Don't blame me for eating all the ham.. I gave it out to people, so at most I'm guilty of ham distribution
I don't know ur idea of a good first date but I'm pretty sure it shouldn't include him holding my hair while I puke in the street
no one could get around him on the stairs cause he surrounded himself with all the empties he could find, he said he was building a fort. then he passed out on them.
When he came downstairs he looked at me like I was attempting to rob his house.
Did you reintroduce yourself?
He threatened to call the cops.
Sign she's a keeper: "I would rather be late to brunch than waste a perfectly good boner."
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
Lets just put it this way. Im meeting his nana after a mind blowing orgasm.
It's a sad day when you're not really phased by the McChicken video only because you've seen weirder porn.
Why do so many fanfic writers want to see hockey players get pregnant?
Randomize
