roommate just walked in on us. two and a half times. the half, she just knocked, sighed, and walked away.
Just lost my virginity while listening to rick astley. torn between horror and jubilation
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
Its like im going on a blind date, but ive already had sex with her
Just saw a girl trying to crack an egg with her butt cheeks. I think I know what we're doing thursday night.
You drunk dialed me talking about the stages of mitosis. There is no way you didn't ace your bio final
high. he's playing 'oops i did it again' on the ukelele. is this real life?
My roomate asked me why she found condoms in the pringles container. I don't know what to tell her
It's kind of hard to say bye to you when you fall asleep on the bar..
YOU STOLE THE WEDDING CAKE?!?!
Only one tier
Tastes like cardboard anyway
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
RE-DICK-YOU-LUSSSSS
That's me emphasizing the ridiculous
I was just at the gas station and happened to look left and see a girl blowing some guy. How was your night?
Just saw a hotel with a bunch of mattresses in the parking lot. Made me think of you.
Took the ex out to the bar, then left with her and her best friend....and you said this was a bad thing.
Randomize
