just a forewarning-if you come home and hang out with your stupid girlfriend the entire time that you are here/fail to get wasted with us i will wish either death upon you or that you truly do turn gay when you return to the navy.
Life lesson: using the oven as a heater= $500 electric bill
I thought it was kinda weird that her ten yearold sister was playing bartender, but hey, the girl makes a damn good drink
I know I should be focused on nurturing their bright little minds but it's 10 a.m. and I need a cock in my mouth
I feel I should make it clear.....I'm not stalking you, I'm stalking ur dick. You don't even need to talk when you get here. At 4am I think we'd both prefer that anyway.
My only objective is to get drunk enough to forget the last 364 days.
LISTEN TO ME! GAY. FIREFIGHTER. They are the most rare and precious kind of gay. The kind little gays dream of. It needs to happen.
So if a girl goes for it you're gonna stop her and tell her you gave up ejaculation for lent?
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
Should I go sleeveless of strapless?
Hmmm, it doesn't matter. You're gonna be topless by the end of it.
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
Turns out both me and my grandpa have a guilty pleasure for South American men.
He started talking about getting a puppy together. So of course I went down on him later
I found a hair colour I want in a porn.
so we’ve decided to fuck for our own health
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