writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
his mom and i are swapping prescript pills..totally mother in law material.
She crushed my hand with the box spring last time, so it's all good.
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
And I would just like to take the time to say my boobs look great today.
we went from five shot glasses to three in one night. we lost 'badass' and gumbi, but the ninja turtle survived. courtney says to avoid any more casualties we're not allowed to use shot glasses past 1am. and we're not allowed to throw them
I left my bra and a book at his place. He's a hot Scandinavian who is into physics and computers - had to step up my game.
I just want someone to shove bread from panera down my throat
I feel like Jeremy snapchattong while we're fucking is a perfect example of our generation..
Grandpa just put 6 jello shots on his plate. My aunt tried to take them away; he flipped her off. Living in the retirement home has hardened him.
Then I did coke with my taxi driver where he then ended up paying me for the drive. You should try being a girl sometime it's super sick.
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
I lost my pants last night, she told me I walked into their room after leaving 5 minutes before wearing my thong.....and no pants. I have absolutely no idea where I left them.
I'm sorry I couldn't bail you out, apparenty they dont take credit cards over the phone. Did you at least make any friends in jail?
I just split a tacobell party box with my boss. 12 tacos. We were equals for a moment.
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