Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
did you mean anything you said last night? i just wnna know
no
if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
Turns out getting tied up to two door handles and forced to repeatedly cum is actually a really good ab workout.
this weekend destroyed me...my brain feels like the curly fry at the bottom of the bag. GAhhh come save me
that's ecstasy for ya. now I'm kinda in the mood for jack in the box.
You do resemble something that has been used as a chew toy.
I don't know which part of you thought this was funny but it's fucked up to wake up in that much fluff and now we don't have a couch. Fuck you.
Dating Detox Day 5: had to go out and buy new batteries. this may be harder than I thought
So to recap Superbowl Sunday - I won $100, bumped into the anti-christ and his cult, met a guy in a kilt and a wican, then got invited to a gayguy afterhours party.
Gonna be tough to beat that next year!
Night one million where I have madri gra beads around my neck and no justifiable reason for where they came from
I threw a beer bottle at the bartender and pissed myself. Somehow, I didn't get kicked out.
The CEO is puking on the sidewalk and the HR director just offered me coke. Engineers have the best parties
So I took my bra off and threw it in the bushes before we went to the bars..
Mass text: You have all failed me. How have the people I loved so much let me go so long in life without ever eating a McRib sandwich?!
I smell like beef jerky
That's among the sexiest things you've ever said to me.
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