bowling with tennis balls and shot glasses. whatever you dont knock down after 2 rolls, you drink.
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
We have nothing in common but the sex rocks, would it be awful to develop a drug habit just to have a topic of conversation?
I just found out I was conceived in a rehab facility... that's better than finding out your dad could be someone else right?
I had to call maintenance to come unclog the toilet.
Something to remember me by.
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
Needing to keep one leg on the floor during sex so you dont spin should qualify for some kind of drunk award.
Just found a partially digested mushroom under my bed. Thanks for that.
My roomate asked me why she found condoms in the pringles container. I don't know what to tell her
It was awful. Mid hookup he started reading the titles of the books over my bed, which were about Russian imperial history. He then started asking me questions about the class I was reading the books for. I was like "WE HAVE TIME FOR THAT LATER, PLEASE CONTINUE."
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
Sorry was covered in semen when you texted me. Just walking back from the Harvard Club
All you needed to say was one of those sentences and the other would've been implied.
I feel better now, I have multiple fuck buddies again
I feel like I should send her I'm sorry I've been fucking your boyfriend flowers.
Why the fuck are you playing with legos?
Why the fuck are you questioning me?
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