No matter how drunk I am, I will take the time to wipe a pube off the toilet seat.
is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
watching law and order svu marathons. all of the sex crimes cases start like my sat night.
Be careful there's warming lubricant on the floor. I will clean and explain later.
She came back in her actual cheerleader uniform. Made a bad bj tolerable.
Found my shoes and purse. They're all strapped together in my neighbor's tree. Need to borrow your ladder. Thanks in advance
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
I feel like I'm going to get the reputation of being the girl who brings her dog with her to all her random hookups.
He actually just looked up and said I'm gonna cum in my pants. and he did. no shame.
Can I also remind you that we insisted on touching his mustache?
Well of course I remember it took up like 20 minutes of my night.
It's official. Those are now your come fuck me flipflops
You wouldn't believe how many pro-life stickers, and "show us your tits" signs there are between here and Dallas.
I always make inappropriate sexual decisions during the holidays
On another note, I kinda only wanna poop laying down now
OMG OMG OMG Ive hit the penis jackpot
It seriously took everything in my power not to sleep with him
What did it come out and serenade you? Lol
It sang to me in the dark. It was magical
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