I plan on using my big titties for evil tonight.
All signs point to mom being high. 1) making chicken at 2 am. 2) dancing to smooth jazz. 3) she asked where the peanut butter was
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
I would have to gauge my vagina to make it fit.
I just found a bag of teeth...
I defriended her. I just can't support someone whose profile picture is of their water birth.
I punched some guy in the face for being an asshole then later I went to say sorry and give him a hug and he started making out with me. How was your new years?
I'm just sayin. If your gonna cheat go for someone TOTALLY different. Fucking her twin would be a waste.
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
Also I'm so used to having sex with river guides that when he pulled out a condom I was actually surprised
There's no good way to say, "sorry your son saw me naked on top of your brother"
Let's get the cat blown out
Im wearing black today mourning the orgasm i couldn't get this morning :(
He broke his arm in a fistfight with the bouncer. it was neat.
If you wake up with half a an eyebrow.... I'm pretty sure it was a good time.
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