The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
drinking colt 45 because lando calrissian told me to
Your ass just called me, someone was yelling "awful waffle" and also, " I don't know who's hands are who's anymore"
Our drug dealer just got busted, wear black tmrw
I think after that blow job he got the other day he'd set himself on fire if I asked.
I don't know at which point last night turned terribly, terribly wrong, but it was somewhere around Motel 6, specifically the parking lot.
They're showing aladdin at the bar my birthday is complete
Im drinking ciroc out of an ice cream cone... my night is going fantastic
Thanks be to the Goddess of Whores!! I straightened my bed before Ken got here. Found Calvin's boxers in the sheets!!!!
I had very briefly met him a few years ago. My friend was tired of hearing us both complain about being horny. She figured she would fuck two birds with one stone.
We hooked up and then we watched game of thrones while he fed me chocolate. I don't see how our benafriendship is a bad thing.
He went out to smoke and when he came back I was still in the same spot naked and unable to breathe.
All I could say was, "ladies and gentlemen, THIS is why I drive 30 mins"
Would it be weird if I bought knee pads and shin guards to fuck in my car?
he called me 'mate' and i had to remind him that you dont call people mate who continously make your dick hard
Who knew she had talents apart from chugging wine spritzers
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