that's an acceptable place to lick
I can only imagine the horrible things my future wife is doing on spring break right now.
new hobby: convincing random sorority girls around campus that we hooked up last weekend. i'm 2 for 5.
How many times a week can a couple have a threesome with the same guy before it becomes some sort of 3-way relationship?
What was your penis's nickname in high school? Also, what was it's theme song?
Freedom, beauty, truth, and love to all. I also probably have syphilis
This makes me miss penis. Not in a horny way... but in a sad, sentimental way.
This guy smells like mr Rogers puppets and I don't know how to deal with it
You said that when your ex gave you a blowjob her mouth was like velvet
Dude, she doesn't even live here... She just can't eat all our food and masturbate on my dog's couch...
My gynaecologist hit my g-spot today by accident and for some reason I went "at least someone found it" VERY AWKWARD
Just had empanadas for breakfast while watching Wall-e with my yesterday's one night stand mother AND grandmother.
HOCKEY BUTTS AND BASEBALL BUTTS HONESTLY DO SOMETHING TO ME
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
Get over here and bring your drill!!! The strippers next door need help installing a stripper pole by their pool
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