its awkward enough using a urinal next to your dad but its worse finding out hes one of the guys who goes no hands and moans it out
I realize now. I should have just made out with everyone and anyone when I had the chance.
Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
It has to be really easy to get midgets drunk.
using the campers leftover pizza money at the bar. Definition of great counselors right here.
Dude I am not desperate enough to pay my dealer in change. Maybe tomorrow.
Also I think my taxi driver may have just died and we just happen to be on a 35 mph cruise control on 395...
My hickies are dark enough that I can feel drivers judging me from across an intersection
And then you told me I had large hands and looked like a girl who would have an illegitimate child that I never talked about
Why must everything this weekend have to do with something going into or coming out of my vagina?
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
Do you think next time you could control the yawn? Kind of a buzzkill to be mid-orgasm and see you yawning over there.
And that was the night we had mind-blowing sex with the score from Raiders of the Lost Ark blaring on vinyl in the background...
You guys go ahead and have your romantic night. I'm gonna keep my vday tradition alive of angry banging a stranger.
Strip club or gay bar tonight?
I am an emotionally compromised bisexual.
Randomize
