u cheatin on me?
if i did i would try to upgrade babe.
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
she asked if she could keep her bee antennas on during her mugshot. i love halloween.
Is it horrible that I want to keep my purple landing strip until after my gyno apt? I feel like someone beside myself should see it...
I let a naked juice spill down my leg for like 30 minutes bc i thought i was hallucinating that my leg was cold.
The best, and by the best I mean the worst, was the 7 month along pregnant chick in the skin tight body suit.
Being at this stripclub only reinforces how single I am. And I was *just* becoming okay with that.
No...this little piggys going to the bar
I just wanna say I did some math and I lasted 1,052,000 more minutes than you at the bar before I got kicked out. That's 729 days. Bitch
Spent fifteen minutes in the car thinking i was psychic before i realized the cd was not on shuffle
The inflatable penis from those pics was mine... We broke him that night
You were so stoked after landing that flip that you dropped acid with three random guys without hesitation
But forealz I'm gonna need a solid 52 orgasms so hydrate.
I am that special "drink water and be grateful I'm alive" kind of hungover
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